a conversation with grace

Recently we had a sweet neighbor girl over to play. I'll call her Grace to protect her identity - her parents may not like their daughter being blogged about, even though only good will be said of her.

Grace is 6 years old, and Ezekiel and Eden LOVE to play with her. They always want her to come over and play outside with them, but they're too bashful to go to her house and ask her to play. (I am sure both Mason and I would have been the same way at their age!) She is not the first little neighbor girl that's been special to them; when we lived on base they came to adore one who was a little older. Looking back I can see God opening my heart to the idea of having a daughter who is older than Ezekiel. 

As I watched my two older ones play with Grace in our driveway, I imagined Kamelia in her place and saw a beautiful sight. She'll fit just right. I'd mentioned Kamelia to Grace before, but I don't think it registered until she was sitting on Eden's bed holding Eden's wallet-sized picture of her soon-to-be sister in her hands. Here is how our conversation went:

"Who's this?"

"That's Kamelia, Ezekiel and Eden's new sister. We're adopting her."

(looking around) "Where is she?"

"She's in Bulgaria right now. I can show you where that is on the map in the dining room."

"Did you guys grow her?"

"She didn't grow in my belly like our other three kids, but she's growing in my heart."

"Does she have parents?"

"No, not yet. We'll be her parents."

"Where does she live?"

"She lives in an orphanage."

"What's an orphanage?"

"It's a place where many children without parents live. There are rows of beds in big rooms full of little girls waiting for mommies and daddies. We pray that they will all get some."

By now Grace was fidgeting and looking quite sad. This was especially meaningful when I realized that the little girl holding the picture was only 7 months younger than the girl IN the picture. I hoped Grace's parents wouldn't mind the discussion that probably came up later that night. It seems to me that some parents try to shelter their children from painful realities like orphanages, but not necessarily from popular culture - TV commercials, popular music and radio, and the influence of institutional school environments, for example. Well, here in the Martin household we lovingly shelter them from each of the latter but not from the former. I'm grateful that our children have known about the plight of orphans for as long as they can remember, and that they know what God's Word has to say about their responsibility (James 1:27). We pray that they grow up to care for orphans and widows in their distress, and we are teaching them that there are many ways to do this besides international adoption!

Here are some other questions Grace asked:

"Does she cry a little?"

"Do they have some food and drink there?"

"Does she have some teachers?"

When she seemed to be out of questions, I told her she could keep the picture and asked if she would pray for Kamelia. She solemnly nodded her head and placed the picture on Eden's shelf on her way out of the room, as it was time for her to go home for dinner. Though she was visibly bothered by the thought of Kamelia having to wait for us, I was sweetly encouraged by the time we shared with Grace that day. It reminded me that Kamelia is a real, living, breathing 6-year-old who will learn to scooter, run and bike with her brothers and sister. It reminded me that 6-year-old girls are sweet, precious and innocent, no matter what they have been forced to endure in their short lives.