a day is like a thousand years?

You know that passage in the Bible that says to the LORD a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day? It's in 2 Peter. Well, that about summed up my fear heading into Mason's week-long TDY. Now I am not super keen on using acronyms when I don't know what they stand for, and I have to admit I just looked up TDY because I always thought it stood for Temporary DutY and it really bothered me that the Y came from the end of the word. Wikipedia is telling me that it means Temporary Duty Yonder, which is fun sounding. I like the yonder part. So Mason went on one of these yonder assignments for the first time in a long time, and while he was gone (during the thousand-years-long days) I had some great opportunities for reflection!

After 6.33 years of marriage and almost 9 of knowing him, I love Mason more than ever. In retrospect I am sure I did not know the guy at all as we stood at the altar all starry-eyed. How could I have really known him? I knew him enough to know I wanted to marry him and that he was good husband and father material. But those were educated guesses. Unfortunately 6 years is more than enough time for a marriage to go sour, for spouses to drift apart, to become different people and to fall apart. It is only by the grace of God that I married a man who drew closer to Him since our wedding day rather than in the opposite direction. Mason might be unrecognizable next to the clueless groom he was in 2007. I say clueless in a kind way; how could he have known what it would be like to live with me and walk through 3 pregnancies and births and babies together? In marriage, as with parenthood, we had no idea what we were getting into, but we didn't really care because we knew it was right and the LORD had led us to that point. We often say to each other now, in the thick of sleep deprivation and chaos and long days and laughing as naked babies run through the house, that in 5-10 years we will look back and realize that we didn't know each other at all during this time. I guess we are learning from our own history that the passage of time reveals much and deepens our relationship. I'm so very grateful to God first and to my husband second that this has been true.

Mason is an amazing father! He has always been a good one, but seeing him literally covered in children anytime he is home (which I've only really witnessed in the last 8 months) brings a new dimension to my appreciation of him. He views each of our children as an investment in the kingdom of God, meaning that his prayer for their lives is that wherever they go they would spread the kingship of Christ, which is the highest purpose that can motivate the two of us as parents.

Mason just GETS a lot of things now that he just couldn't get right away. I get things too. This leads to many averted crises. Averted crises are good with 3 children under 4 and one more child on the way (adopting, not pregnant, for anyone who's somehow missed the memo). We laugh at the same things now, and we think each other is right more often because we both say things that reflect the other's unique (weird by many standards) opinions. We are an efficient team. We can divide and conquer and can now humble ourselves to do the tasks we once avoided because, well, if it doesn't get done now it cuts into the 10 minutes we may get together after everyone is asleep and homework is done and the house is cleaned up, so we just suck it up and do the task quickly and willingly. I could go on. Having him gone for several nights allowed me the opportunity to reflect on how grateful I am to be partnered for life with a best friend.

Another unexpected blessing from this week was seeing how the children and I were able to make adjustments in our expectations and relationships to compensate for Mason's absence. I found myself very pleased at their ability to understand and communicate (Ezekiel and Eden, at least!). Isaiah was the tall pole in the tent, so to speak, since he obviously did not possess those skills in equal amounts to his brother and sister. But he also did great and even shifted his bedtime up so that I could have time with the older kids after he went down. This took him the first couple of days to perfect, but he was adapting and adjusting in his own little 8-month-old way and I appreciated it. On the last night of the TDY, the four of us went out to dinner at McAlister's and really had a fantastic time. I was kind of in shock that dining out could be a pleasant experience with a 4-year-old, 2-year-old, and a baby - I only took them out because we were out of food and I didn't have the energy to go grocery shopping but we had to get out of the house. So, nice surprise there. True to His promise, the LORD was with me wherever I went and gave me everything I needed to conquer a big fear of mine: being on my own without husband or family around. As I read the words I just wrote, I can see why it is easier for me now than it was when we just had one baby or none at all - I thrive on being around people, so having the chaos and fun of our 3 little ones by my side is preferable to me over being left alone or with one small child. I also found myself feeling very grateful for how God has provided for us through Mason's job. Like I often tell the kids, Daddy works hard for us so that I can stay with you all day and we can live in this nice house! Sometimes the truth of simple statements I direct at them hits me like a ton of bricks. 

Mason returned home this evening to everyone's great joy, and I am thrilled to know that next time he has to go away I can face the time with confidence and remember how perfectly God provided for us this week, right down to the timing of Mason's departure with my rapid return to health after (another) bout with mastitis and the disappearance of Ezekiel's recent fever. I am getting a little closer to living like I really know this secret, the one that the apostle Paul wrote about in Philippians 4:

"I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation...I can do all this through him who gives me strength."